This is the backyard where the snow fell. (And fell and fell.)

 

This is the bush in the backyard where the snow fell. (And fell and fell.)

 

This is the husband who swatted snow off the bush in the backyard where the snow fell. (And fell and fell.)

 

This is the thorn that stuck all the way through and broke off inside the finger* of the husband when he swatted snow off the bush in the backyard where the snow fell. (And fell and fell.)

 

This is the husband at the ER because of the thorn that stuck all the way through and broke off inside his finger* when he swatted snow off the bush in the backyard where the snow fell. (And fell and fell.)

(He looks so happy, doesn’t he?)

 

4 shots to the finger later…

This is the surgery – complete with neon green tourniquet – performed on the husband in the ER because of the thorn that stuck all the way through and broke off inside his finger* when he swatted snow off the bush in the backyard where the snow fell. (And fell and fell.)

 

This is the finger that STILL harbors a thorn AFTER surgery was performed – complete with green tourniquet – on the husband in the ER because of the thorn that stuck all the way through and broke off inside his finger* when he swatted snow off the bush in the backyard where the snow fell. (And fell and fell.)

 

This is the husband soaking his hand because of the finger that still harbors a thorn after surgery was performed – complete with green tourniquet – on his hand in the ER because of the thorn that stuck all the way through and broke off inside his finger* when he swatted snow off the bush in the backyard where the snow fell. (And fell and fell.)

 

This is the lesson learned by the husband soaking his thorny hand because of the finger that still harbors a thorn after surgery was performed – complete with green tourniquet – on his hand in the ER because of the thorn that stuck all the way through and broke off inside his finger* when he swatted snow off the bush in the backyard where the snow fell. (And fell and fell.):

Never judge a bush by its “cover.”

 

Other versions of this lesson:

A soft and fluffy exterior may hide a world of thorns.

Never swat at snow unless you know what is underneath.

Sometimes, beauty is only skin-deep.

 

Other lessons learned yesterday:

• Never ever bring kids to the ER. Ever. (So thankful for friends who came to the rescue so we didn’t have to! WE LOVE YOU, friends!)
• Winter gloves are great for keeping your hands warm, but they don’t do much to protect you from sharp objects.
• When going to the ER with a thorn/stick broken off inside your finger, be prepared for the receptionist to say something like, “So. You’re here for a… splinter?”
• Be grateful for the nurse who says, “Not a splinter. More like an impaled foreign object.” Yes. That sounds much better, thank you.
• Just because something doesn’t show up in an x-ray doesn’t mean it isn’t there.
• When you’ve been impaled by a foreign object, one that enters your finger on the palm side and is visible just under the surface on the top side, you might think it is best to cut into the top to pull it out. And you might be right. Or you might just create a crater in the top side, so now you have matching holes on both sides of your finger. And the impaled object still stuck inside.
• Just because a scalpel can tap the impaled object so that you can actually hear the click, doesn’t mean that the surgeon will be able to retrieve said impaled object.
• When you go the ER with an impalement and they do x-rays, give you Benadryl, 4 numbing shots in your finger, a tetanus shot, and perform minor surgery on your finger, yet they do not remove the impaled object, you still have to pay for the x-rays, Benadryl, 4 numbing shots in your finger, the tetanus shot, and the minor surgery. Bonus: You go home with a hand that hurts worse than when you went in.
• Sometimes, in order to get a date night, you have to impale your finger. (JUST KIDDING RHONDA! And lots of others. We know you’re willing to babysit.) 🙂
• You know you have a good relationship with your spouse when you spend 4 hours in the Emergency Room, laughing the whole time, leave with the same problem you had when you came, and are still laughing together by the time you drive home on snow and ice covered roads. I love you, my brave husband! (This is, by far, my favorite part of the “lessons.”)
  
• Oh yes. And never ever bring kids to the ER. Ever!!

*Summary: A stick/thorn pierced his glove, entered his finger on the palm side, went all the way through to the opposite side, and stopped just underneath the outer layer of skin. We could see it. His finger turned red and hot and was painful to the touch, not to mention had some serious swelling. The broken thorn still stuck in his glove. The remaining chunk of thorn was inside his finger.

The end.